Everything I Ever Dreamed
by e1r3mom
Summary: At the end of her divorce Bella meets the man of her dreams. Learning to let go and love again isn't going to be easy but she wants this, she wants him. And shes going to learn letting go of the past is going to be easier than she thought possible.
1. Chapter 1

There are things in life you don't want to remember and things that your mind wont let you forget. You learn to let things go. You learn to move on from your past so you can have a nice future. This is my story of letting go and finding yourself. And the man you never dreamed existed. This is my story, this is my plan, and this is going to be my future. He just surprised me. He saw through me like a newly windexed window, it scary yet exciting. This is my story about starting over and finding not only yourself again but the love you never thought possible.


	2. How I got here!

BPOV

I had meet Mike Newton Jr In February 2002. He was all I dreamed about. He was nice and good looking, he tall and had a award winning smile. We began dating shortly after I turned 19 he was from a well known family. They owned a chain of different sporting good stores. Everything seemed perfect he started showing me things that I never knew existed. His parents were well known and respected people they worked hard for the things they had.

We got married July 2, 2004. On the surface we looked happy but no one knew about the almost daily beatings and verbal abuse. No one knows about girls that he went out with every night. I was like a trophy. A pretty thing to show the entire world but never treated nicely. I was broken and thought that this is what I had deserved. This was the best my life was going to get. I got pregnant in December 2004 in which I spent the majority of it alone in a one bedroom apartment while he went out with his friends. Of course I was upset but what really could I do?

I had my daughter Elizabeth in September 2005. She was so cute with her fuzzy brown hair. She gave me a reason to live a purpose to wake up. I always said growing up that I didn't want children but the moment that I held her I knew that she was my world. I cared for her myself, Mike just cared that she was something new to show his friends and family. She was everything to me, she was the best baby you could think of. She slept all night as long as she was in the baby swing. She was a little person that I would do anything for. But if she cried I would get beat, I had to keep her quite. He would kick me punch me, he was three time my size and he just didn't care. She had just learned to walk when I found out I was pregnant yet again. I wasn't having sex with Mike I was being repeatedly raped day in and out.

I had lost my virginity to this man that I had hated. I hated to look at him. I hated to wake up because I knew that just one thing would set him off. I had my son Mike Newton III in January 2007. He was a little hand full. He was born a bit premature, but weighed almost 10 pounds. He spent 17 days in the NICU and was finally allowed to come home. I was blamed because he had to go to the NICU but how could I not go into premature labor after being kicked in the stomach?

After he came home life just went back to normal. Not only did I have to watch the kids and be the perfect pretend wife. I had to cater to his friends whenever they would come over. He never lifted a finger, never a plate, never laundry; he never even got his own soda from the fridge. After cooking, cleaning, watching the kids, and doing every other mundane thing he had me do. I started to get depressed. Then my mom was rushed to the hospital within hours she was died of a massive stroke.

I never had time to grieve because he made fun of me about it. I couldn't cry and I got heavier and heavier. But I suffered through. Then May 2009 happened I just got both the kids out of the bath and put the kids down for a nap. An hour later I went in to wake up the kids but my son never woke up. My baby had passed away of SIDS. After everything that I had been through I lost part of myself. I lost half of my world. We buried my son 6 days later in a very elaborate funeral. Hundreds and hundreds of people grieved with us. Then the day after the funeral he began spending time with Jessica. In July 2009 I guess they got serious because he stopped coming home all together. He blamed me and I blamed myself for losing my son. It was sad to say that I was happy that he had found someone else.

I filed for divorce December 1st, 2009. It was one of the happiest days of my life. To finally know that he was out of my life. I moved in with my brother that day. And so began my new life and the new me.


	3. Everything I knew

BPOV

I had found them the pictures that comfirmed my suspecians the pictures that hurt a little more than I cared to admit but I knew I would make it through this. I wouldnt live like this forever. I was going to be happy and this was the start of my journey. July 15th 2009 was the day that I found them I sucked it up a pushed through. He was sending naughty pictures back and forth between his pictures via a cell phone that was under my name.

I wasn't shocked really or relieved because even though I hated the man I still cared for him. He was my rock when I needed on for the past seven plus years. He was what I thought I deserved and he was what I knew. I hadn't dated anyone else since I was eighteen years old. I was scared at what was out there. The unknown. I started college September 16th 2009. Just a couple of days after my daughters 4th birthday.

I had moved my things across the hall into my daughters bedroom. and the new girlfriend moved into my old bedroom I sucked it up for my daughters sake. I didn't push the fact anymore than that. I had given up gracefully you could say. There was nothing else to do. I would slowly but surely move out but I knew that a custody battle was the last thing I wanted to put her through. I finally moved out all the way in February 2010 yes it took me forever but it took me that long to let go of my old life fully. I dated around a lot not really finding the right kind of man I wanted or knew I deserved. So I began to lose weight.

I took care of myself a little more than I became accustomed to in the last couple of years. I learned the wonders of make-up application. There were a couple of definite possibilities out there. There was Jacob, he was everything I thought I wanted til I figured out what a complete and total joke he was. He worked at the hardware store. And i used the term "worked" very liberally. He barely did any of that than complained that his life wasn't really headed anywhere. So I knew that wasn't going to work out.

I got my drivers licence at the end of Feb 2010. Saved u enough money to buy myself crappy little car. I loved her though a 1995 metallic grey Eclipse. She solderedthrough with me on my journey. Then there was Erik. What can I say about Erik? He took me by sup rise. Not exactly my type but hey I tried. He was book smart and was fun to make out with but I knew that wasn'tgoing anywhere. He moved away which was perfectly fine with me although I did learn alotabout myself during that month. He taught me that I was beautiful and that I had to learn to be optimistic about the outcome of reality and life.

Every guy that I meet taught me something. I knew I wasn't a ugly women. I had gotten attention from the male population and not even realized it sometimes. Then I meet Gabriel after trying the on-line dating thing my friends signed me up for. And if you want to talk about crazy just look Gabriel up in the dictionary. He had more mental problems the entire medical review board had time to cover in a week. That ended shortly after a week. I mean really he wanted to go live the picket fence fantasy after a week.

But like I said before they all taught me something. In total I had been on 17 bad dates and 3 sort of relationships. I learn to believe in myself, that I was beautiful, that I had to learn to trust again. But I didn't find the most important part. Until exactly one year exactly. July 16th2010 my entire world changed. With a little phone number that was text-ed to me the morning that changed everything and the day Edward Cullen came into my life. That's the day I found all the parts that where missing.


	4. AN

To All my Fanfiction followers!

I am going to be finishing up Legend among Legends soon!

Racing Hearts is going to be added to at least once a week starting Friday. So this is the good news!

So thank you to all myfollowers and thank you for staying with me I just graduated and have lots of ideas and didnt want to adopt out my stories. Agian thank you all and there will be more done soon!


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